Do Men Fake Orgasms?

Men faking orgasms
Fake orgasm has long been believed to be women's style. That may be responsible for the total disbelief in any study about men faking orgasms.

According to a new Canadian survey of 230 men age between 18 and 29 who had faked orgasms with their current partners. On average, the survey showed men pretended to orgasm during a full quarter of their sexual encounters. This survey is also similar to Time Out New York's which showed a staggering 30.6% of its survey participants (less than 100 New York men) admitted to fake orgasms. Hey women, are these facts making you anxious and you planning to be more self-conscious when next you have sex with men? Are you thinking hard to see if your man ever faked an orgasm?

This Canadian survey also delved into the reasons why men fake orgasms and how those reasons are related to their relationship satisfaction. Previous studies showed that men's penchant for faking orgasms is kind off similar to the reasons why women play act in bed. Both have reported that they fake because they are committed, to arouse their partners, and to end sex sooner; the common reason among both genders is protecting their partners' feelings. However, indications from this new survey shows that men who pretend to orgasm because they want to avoid talking about their sexual desires are less likely to be satisfied in their relationship and on bed. "These men might be contributing to their own low desire and satisfaction by strengthening unsatisfying sexual activity by faking orgasm rather than talking about their sexual needs and desires." Says the study's authors.

Gender norms that compel men to strive for unrealistic benchmarks of sexual performance is the root cause of faked orgasms as sub-ins for honest talks about sexual desires. Harvard urologist Abraham Morgentaler said "the image is that men are always up for sex, which makes you feel under pressure to perform even when you don't want to," as the reason for men's faking.
Those same expectations have given rise to women's fake orgasms too. It is often believed that women fake because their men are so goal-oriented they would not stop until a woman climaxes. Our social standard of sexual pleasure has defined men's orgasm as simple and inevitable, while women's orgasm as reflections of their male partner's sexual abilities. The authors of the new Canadian survey write that these reductive ideas may inspire men to fake orgasm to "appear normal" and women to fake it so their partners' egos don't drop.

Just like women do, men are also sometimes more concerned with their partners' feelings that they are with their own pleasure or desire to stop having sex. There are many cases of men who fake orgasm because their female partners may "not be into" sex much or just starting out to make sex (in cases of very young people). This leads to profoundly sad possibilities of continuous sexual encounters where both partners fake their orgasms to please each other. That specter is as a result of a society that places orgasms higher over the complex reality of sexual pleasure.



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